BY LIVI STANFORD
CitIzens News
NAUGATUCK — The lyrics stopped Valerie Machnics in her tracks as she heard the song on a fall day last year, two-and-a- half months after her son, Travis LaRowe, died in a motorcycle accident.
“Drop the ball, thank you all. One more chance to play,’ ” goes the song “Let Me Out” by Australian rock band Electric Mary.
Since the age of 14, LaRowe played drums in the band NINER, with his mother, Machnics, on lead vocals. The bond the two formed over music was an unshakable force.
The searing pain from the loss of her son caused Machnics to stop playing music after his death on June 16, 2023.
Witnesses said Carol DeBernardis, 76, crossed the double-yellow line in the northbound lane of New Haven Road and struck two motorcycles, one driven by LaRowe, 22, and another by Javier Vazquez, 20, who suffered serious injuries. A third rider, Jason Vazquez, 24, suffered minor injuries.
LaRowe, who was operating a 2004 Harley-Davidson, was transported to Saint Mary’s Hospital where he was pronounced dead.
DeBernardis faces a charge of negligent homicide. She is scheduled to appear in Waterbury Superior Court on June 26.
Machnics’ eyes filled with tears as she described the day she heard that song, which she believes was a message her son sent from heaven: She needed to keep playing music.
“It was almost like Travis was sitting in the car, saying ‘If you give up on music, I am not going to be happy with you.'”
Machnics formed a new band with former members of NINER called Whiskey Dynamite. The mentor of her late son plays the drums.
She said music is keeping her sane as she journeys through tunnels of grief, which get worse as the year anniversary of her son’s death approaches.
“To lose a child is something a parent should never have to experience,” she said, crying. “He was my best friend and my concert buddy.”
Describing her son’s first brush with music in her band, Machnics’ eyes light up. He first had difficulty playing drums, but he never gave up, she said, remembering the determination in his face and his glee when he got the hang of it.
Describing her son as the kindest man who would stop to help anybody, she said he had planned to go to Nashville in hopes of starting a music career.
“His cousin wrote in his obituary that all you had to do was be around him for three minutes to see how humbling and caring of a person he was,” she said.
LaRowe worked as a carpenter for the family business, Morain Carpentry.
He loved motorcycles and particularly enjoyed the time he had with his friends including Vazquez, with whom he grew up, Machnics said.
He loved Guns N’Roses and Lynyrd Skynyrd.
Machnics said the song “Sweet Child of Mine” has taken on new meaning as she thinks about her son, cherishing the time they spent together, which was cut too short.
The two talked every day and bonded over song lyrics. The night before his death, she surprised him when she nailed three songs she struggled with in their band Russian Roulette, which was formed in 2021 when NINER was on hiatus.
“He just had this incredible smile on his face that we accomplished those songs right in a row,” she said. “There was such a glow on his face. I have never seen him so happy.”
Machnics is still in shock when she describes the events of the day of her son’s death. About noon that day, she received a happy message from her son that after three weeks his motorcycle was coming out of the shop and ready to ride. It was the last message that she would ever receive from him. Approximately eight hours later, he lost his life.
When asked the biggest lesson she learned from her son, Machnics took a minute to reflect, then said, with a burst of emotion, “to love.”
“He was a giver, not a taker,” she said.
While Machnics said she is struggling with the loss of her son, she said there is a purpose and that she hopes that this memorial ride, which she will do yearly, can help other families who may have been injured by motorcycle accidents.
“Never take anything for granted and tell the people you love that you love them all the time,” she said.Grieving mom
